(
getting irritated)
Friday, December 15, 2006
gosh i totally hate IEP and i hate my sup... wonder wads wrong with her man... first we met her on thurs and she was ok.. and prev phone conversation really change my perception of the project back..
fuck then today i go back childcare she told the senior teacher tt she very angry with me... coz i din tell miss philo abt mrs koh coming and she wanted to scold me... but scared to embrassed me in front of my friends.. fuck la.. as if my fault ok maybe partly coz i am all the while coordinating with her and pls it is a grp work i felt so fucking idiot and sandwhich when such things happen... today i finally cannot take it ,... iz ok for her to blame me anyway i wun be going back to the centre after tt... wad for u put up a show in front of my friends.. damn sia..
i felt so sick tt why why always me.. think i look trouble for myself for suggesting my childcare.. and yes indeed we get the freedom to do many things but at the end i make myself suffer.. WTF... stupidz me ..
then after mandy left i was all alone.. looking after the kids till they sleepp.. then supposed all to reach at 3... none came back and not even a call tt hey i'll be late... so irritated... why no sense of responsibility and u call this grp work and this is not the first time.. then i felt so helpless. slowly set up the table.. then at last the activity went smooth and done in 30 mins.. so many things happen.. like last min the things having changes like kids have speech and drama and stuff...
one thing i was sad tt.. mrs koh visit is last min and we think is not so impactful for the centre.. till today wad miss philo told me.. abt wad tt women says abt me.. and i see the trs so busy puttin up labels and stuff.. i felt bad and sad.. and i actuall asked miss philo: are u all busy bcoz mrs koh coming.. i am so sorry... iz like wtf whu knows how i feel! i felt so lousy deep inside i felt like last time my closeness with the teachers had drifted.. and this project had made the r/s sour tho... gosh maybe i'm just not good at handling such matter and taking things for granted...
fed up... hate this feeling... wishing for the project to end soon... FUCK man
anyway i had a great lunch and night with alex thank u for giving me support all the time.......... haiz
everlasting? kissed /
- Friday, December 15, 2006
